ShE CrIeS

This is based on the real story ... 4 years back when I was returningfrom Pune ... It is about a girl who was sitting just besides me..crying throught the 21 hrs long Journey...and based on the littleconversation i had with her... I can still feel the pain and theagony she was going through .....!!!!
Aha .... the dawn .. the darkness still encompasses you!!! In themiddle of the road she walks back to the unknown. 4 A.M in the morningand the midnight breeze ruffling through her messed up hair. With eyesall filled with glistening tears, partially because of the bitter cold,partially because of the pain inside. A million thoughts runningthrough the mind.. what if this would have happened, what if that hadhappened.
Why ... what ... where.. how... a million thoughts......Coming from her last trial, the last attempt to make it all up, wishing thateverything will be back to normal, he might agree! He said they were made for each other, the uncountable number of promises, how cute shewas always, how her smile was his life and all such crap... yeah crapit was ever. How she changed for him... how dependable he had made herfor everything ranging for mental to emotional support. For everysecond she begged, for every breath she took she called him. for everysecond they talked, she prayed for him. His presence warmed her lifefor so long that it seemed like an eternity. She dint call for him, but he forced his way into her life and then took away everything away from her.But now when he has taken everything away from her.. herlife and hopes and strength, he called one last time saying that it wasnever meant to be like that. He had some other priorities in life andshe must move on... yeah as simple as that ... she must move on!!!!
But she cant now... the only possible way was through a river of tearsand blood. As simple as that ... in a cafe filled with people, youorder a cup of coffee and start the conversation normally and end itwith a suicidal note. You must move on....
She travelled all the way to beg him one last time, to tell him thatif it was'nt him then itcant be anyone else. Without telling her parents that she is going to him with a journey of more than 1000 miles, withouttelling them what she had been through all this time, without telling them that she had given her everything to him and now there is no turning back.She left amongst heavy thunderstorm and rain. With sadness on her face but alittle hope. With all those wonderful moments, the time when the kissed first, the time when they used to roam on the beach, the time when theyused to dance in the rain... all those times.. Now she was back....back to Bangalore .... ISBT(Majistic) ... 4 AM in the morning got down fromthe bus!!!!
Walking towards the city bus stand..... with no one around... some auto walas looking at her... but she is least botheredtoday... she wants to cry but she cant, she is not alone .. walks slowly thinking, not looking at the road... trying to walk.. cudnt walk....
looks at her cell phone wishing there will be atleast a phone call, alast one may be, she had been waiting for it for the past one week... aphone call ... Aha the bus stand has come ... crowded a bit even at 4AMin the morning... ppl looking at her... but she is alone...
"shall i go home!!! shall i run away.... i can die..yeah i should die... but my parents... my younger sister... ... but i need not explain it tothem once im dead!!!!"
"no i cant die..that is such a bad idea..... im just 21... "
"But i cant live without him.... his touch will torture me his senses, hisbreathes .. everything ... i cant live.. i have to die......"
"No it is not the solution, he was never mine... its not the right path...my parents are still there for me ... "
"What will he think if i die for him.... atleast for one time he will think that i loved her.... one time atleast... "
"what shall i take sleeping pills .. no mercury .... no it should be really sad.. i'll write a note"
"But i have to live.. there is nothing called love... its just lust... orrather fun for people... there is nothing called cupid....."
"I have to die...."she stops in the middle of the path...... ppl still around... busy with thebuses and their routine!!! She stands still... with tears crossing theboundries of her eyes... and voices in her mind. To die or not to die... to live or not to live... to love or not to love.......And she cries.... heavily.... falls on the floor... and she cries